Day 5

Dear Crush -

The first time I saw you was the day that my roommate bought a TV that was too large for us to move into the apartment. You decided to help her and you carried it into the living room without any help. I thought you were so nice.

You lived in #8 and I lived in #3 (I think). We went to the same ward. We went to the same gym, often at the same time. (hm mm, coincidence?) We weren't in the same FHE group, and we were most definitely not anything alike.

We were OK friends. I was sure you had a crush on one of the roommates. It seemed you were always at our house. College was so fun, wasn't it? I loved the carefree feeling and the crazy adventures.

Then there was that night you stole my seat during the movie we were all watching. I wasn't impressed. I sat down next to you, and decided that it was you who had to move. If you'll remember, it was one of those chairs that you have to really like the person to sit next to them. You stayed. I stayed. You held my hand. You played with my hair. You stayed until WAY too late.

Then there was that night that you kissed me for the first time. I felt so excited and so scared at the same time. You see, if you remember right, you were a player. You didn't really want to be my boyfriend. You just wanted a kiss.

After a really long time like this, I realized you weren't ever going to change. I moved to Brasil. I needed time away and time to heal. I needed to be with my parents. I was there three months. What you don't know is that I thought of you every minute of every day. I was hooked. I even listened to a song that you think is dumb, but that reminds me of you every time I hear it. "If your not the one, then why does my hand fit yours, this way." Over and over I listened to that song. I even smelled the bottle of cologne that you gave me for my birthday. I was ridiculous!

I moved home and thought I was done with you. Then I went back to college and you were still there. I tried to avoid you. I failed. Then one day, at your new apartment, I told you that I could never see you again and I walked out.

And I never saw you again....until five years later. When I ended another engagement and a week later you looked me up on facebook.

And dear husband, I just want to say that I still love you the way I did in college and more. Can I just say that you are the best crush a girl could ask for! You make me smile and you make me happy and you are kind and patient and fortunately, you are no longer a player. :)

I love you!
xoxo